To the woman who feels alone.



These affirmations are usually plastered all over social media, but, telling yourself this is not enough. We are constantly being told to love ourselves, respect ourselves,  take care of ourselves, go to the gym, eat healthy, surround ourselves with positive people, and the list goes on and on. We give advice and tell people what they should do but we never ever talk about how to get there. How do you love yourself? How do you value yourself? How do you get out of a relationship that deep down you know is not for you? How do you let go of hurt? How do you forgive? How do you wake up and be happy?


 We are often looking for things to complete us, whether it’s buying a house, getting into a relationship, getting a degree, having a baby, etc. We seek what we think will make us happy. What if I told you that the things of this world will never ever satisfy you? It doesn’t matter how much you have of it or have much you spend time with it, it will never be enough.

At one point I was so depressed. I felt so alone. I knew there was something more. Something so powerful and life changing. I knew deep down that we weren’t put here to be miserable and just live life whatever way we wanted to. We all have purpose and were put on earth for a reason. We weren’t put here to live out the “American Dream”. What happens after you get the American Dream? No one tells you what comes after the American Dream because nothing comes after it. You get the degree, you get the job, you get the spouse, you buy the house, you have the kids, and, that’s where it ends, you live your life day in and day out doing the same exact thing. The American Dream, something that has been embedded in us since we were children, something we define our success by, it’s an illusion that doesn’t bring any type of peace or fulfillment.

I found my peace in Christ. I found my fullness in Jesus. There’s nothing more beautiful than that peace you feel when God is a part of your life. I was always looking for something or someone to complete me. No one or no one thing can ever complete you. God made us. He knows us. He knows what we need. He knows our wants. He knows our desires. He knows everything about us. We were put here for so much more than what this world tells us.  God sent his son to die for YOU, we fall so short, yet, his grace is sufficient. I have no desire to drink alcohol and have sex with random men anymore. I want to fulfill my God-given purpose and make a difference in this world. So many women are suffering. So many women are putting their worth and trust in the wrong things. Yes, I want to be a wife one day and live in a nice house, but, that’s not what defines me. That is not what my worth is based on anymore.

I just want every woman to know that you are the daughter of the Most High. When you realize how you were created and why, you will never ever chase after this world. My purpose is so much bigger than what this world tells me. I don’t need a man to be happy. It’s definitely possible to be single and content. Yes, sometimes I get lonely but I know my time will come. My life changed drastically when I put my trust in God alone. My faith is on a thousand and I know that he will work everything out for my good (Romans 8:28).  Valentine’s day is around the corner and so many single women across social media are making it known that they are single and not happy about it.  It’s so sad that we have to tell the world that we are unhappy about being single. Being single is not a curse! This world makes women feel like if we are single something is wrong with us, and if you’re 30 and single then something is really wrong with you. NOTHING IS WRONG WITH YOU, BREATHE.

Take this time to get to know Jesus. Put him first. Walk away from that sin that’s draining you. Learn how to be obedient. Be different. Stand out. Be who God called you to be. Be content in whatever season you are in. It is a process. THE FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT IS  LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS , GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS,  AND SELF CONTROL. (Galatians 5:22-23). NOT gossiping, clapping back, and doing whatever you want.  We want to be wives without being good women first. A good wife isn’t a woman who just cooks and clean. Stop getting advice from Instagram and open up THE WORD, the best teacher you can ever have is Jesus himself.

This Valentine’s Day go help someone in need. Reach out to someone who is going through it. Go spend time with other single women and plan a fun day. Go pour love into someone else’s life. When you make it all about you, you will never be content.

Jeremiah 17:7 – blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence.

John 10:10 – the thief’s purpose is to steal, kill, and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.

Deuteronomy 31:8 – Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you.

Jeremiah 29:11 – For I know the plans I have for you. Plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and hope.




3 thoughts on “To the woman who feels alone.

  1. We wake up and be happy when we go to sleep after a day of truth, dream chasing, and self-improvement. Affirmations aren’t for changing your mind, they’re for staying on track.

    Face yourself and ask the hard questions. Face every part of you as if it were the only thing you were ever meant to do in life. And after you have, embrace who you find. Hug them, smile at them, accept them.

    When you do that, reconstruct your life to lead you towards continuing that. Lead the life you want to lead, not the one that you’ve fallen into because the circumstances and choices of life pigeon-holed you there.

    I have lived my past 30 years in that life and I never felt fulfilled. So, one day, I decided I needed something new. Now I’m moving to Alaska, doing a radical career change from IT to psychology and counseling, and I’m going to find everything I was meant for. Perhaps I already am.

    Point is, you can’t wait for affirmations to fix you. They won’t. They can’t. You’ll use them when you’ve picked a greater path and then find yourself stumbling.

    Sometimes it gets hard. When it does, to keep from falling off the wagon, face yourself and affirm what you know in your heart tone true: you are worth it, you are doing your best, and you’ve made and will make mistakes along the way. You forgive yourself for them because to love is to forgive and to forgive is to accept.

    “Trust yourself, don’t live too fast; troubles will come and they will pass.” –lynard skynard

    Liked by 1 person

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